Is it better to find out your baby's gender or wait for the surprise?

baby showerWhen I became pregnant with my first child, I wanted to know whether I was having a boy or a girl, but my husband did not. I knew that if I found out, there was no way I would keep it to myself, so we had to come to a decision. He wouldn't budge, I wouldn't budge, so we made a bet. I can't even remember what we bet on, but whoever won the bet would decide if we would find out the baby's gender or not. He won the bet and I tried to be a gracious loser, but I wasn't. I blame the pregnancy hormones, my husband blames me. I needled and begged and whined and whined some more; he didn't fall for my antics. When they stuck a needle in my pregnant belly for an amniocentesis, I may have used that exact moment to my advantage and with a wincing face and pleading eyes asked him to reconsider and let us find out what we were having.


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It worked. He said we could find out. We were having a girl! I was thrilled and terrified at the same time. A girl! I would have been just as thrilled and terrified if it were a boy.

The second time I got pregnant, my husband didn't even try to fight me. He knew I would badger him to find out what we were having. We were having another girl! This time I wasn't terrified just thrilled.

I don't regret my decision to find out what we were having both times and my hubby is fine that he caved. He would have stood his ground if it was something that mattered enormously to him.

But what's the right decision? Is there a right decision? Is it better to know the gender of your baby or not before you give birth?

Turns out that both decisions are right. Experts say that whatever decision you choose is right as long as it is right for you. The baby is not affected either way.

Yay! I'm so happy because now I can tell my husband that experts think my decision to find out was right for me. I may leave out the part that his decision not to find out would have been right too. Obviously he's okay with not knowing everything.

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Topics: gender  pregnancy  parenting