How many times have you said that you aren't having more sex with your husband or your man because of one excuse or another? His fault, of course, always ... or almost always. I've heard it (almost) all and I think that in many ways, my wife is right. But if this Valentine's Day week you're really aiming to put that fire back in your relationship, listen to me and try NOT to committ the following three capital sins that will scare the romance out of any bed instantly...

1. Never say NO. My friend Raúl, a Swiss engineer, says that what most attracted him to his wife, who is Cuban and Lebanese, was her passion in bed. Yes, she's beautiful, in great shape, and very smart, but the chemistry didn't explode between them until they got together in bed. Now, after 13 years, the flame is still alive, but Raúl laments that sometimes the situation turns a little frustrating. What at first was an exercise in giving their imagination and their pleasure free reign has now morphed into one of the hardest negotiations he's ever had to face. If he wants to go on a little trip through the southern part of his wife's body, so to speak, she'll say: "NO! I haven't showered!" But then, if he wants to get a little oral action, she'll say: "NO! YOU haven't showered!" In the end, hearing so many NOs has turned into an absolute mood killer in their marriage and, in the end, they end up doing things fast, with no enjoyment, just to get it over with, and until next time.

Read more in ¿Qué Más? Secrets of a Latin Lover: How to put SEX back in your marriage

2. Image isn't everything. That iconic 80s ad featuring Andre Agassi assured us that "Image is everything." But as Agassi himself demonstrated when he lost all his hair and ended up as bald as the 8-ball, you CAN still succeed even if you don't have the perfect image. And if we talk about the situation in the sack, well this becomes even more evident. Now, I'm not going to lie and say that I'd give up a night in bed with a perfect model who is fresh out of the hair salon, made up with enough makeup for a photo shoot, and with all the necessary accessories. No. But I do have to admit that all this "perfection" makes things a little boring. It's almost as if you need to be afraid the spell will break as soon as the action starts. Natural is so much more fun anyways. Honestly, is there anything better than making love when you first wake up in the morning on the weekend? That moment when you're still half asleep makes everything a little more "groovy." To me, it's much more special to be able to enjoy sex without having to worry about your makeup running or if your hair is going to get messed up.

Read more in ¿Qué Más? It's time for more oral sex!

3. Don't turn down some adventure. Without a doubt, the biggest capital sin that a woman can commit is to turn down some good sexual inventiveness. If you limit yourself to repeating the same old ceremony each time you have sex, in the end, neither one of you will have enjoyed the moment. That's why the best thing you can do is to innovate a little, Indiana Jones-style! Be that surprising him with a romantic, candle-lit dinner, or interrupting his work at home and doing a sensual strip-tease, or even calling him from the bathtub when you're surrounded by bubbles and rose petals--whatever you do, the important thing is to try to think of some erotic, movie-like scene and carry out that pre-production work in your own home--then simply surprise your costar in this fantasy when he gets home from work.

Image via Thinkstock

Add Comment What things do you consider ultimate mood killers when it comes to sex in your relationship?
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Add Comment What things do you consider ultimate mood killers when it comes to sex in your relationship?

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