When I heard about Elizabeth Rudavsky--a Canadian woman who murdered her husband, Angelo Heddington, after enduring his horrible abuse, only to find out after his death that he was actually a woman--I honestly couldn't believe it. I had never ever heard something so bizarre. I mean, Heddington had not only hidden his true identity for months, he created a true hell for Rudavsky, by mentally and physically abusing her, even before they were even married.

Honestly, when I found out more about this couple and saw the images that documented their destructive relationship, I couldn't help but wonder HOW IN THE WORLD Rudavsky never realized that her husband was actually a woman? Not just during their intimate moments, but because of her very obvious femenine traits? How could she marry someone who mistreated her and abused her from the onset of their relationship? How could she smile in a picture that clearly shows a black eye, while her husband is embracing her? So many questions, I know, but I just honestly can't understand how someone can agree to enter in to and sta y in such aterrible relationship...

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According to Rudavsky, she never realized that her then-husband was a woman because Heddington had told her in the very beginning of the relationship that an old girlfriend had burned his (her?) genitals, which is why they always had sex in complete darkness and she never saw her husband naked. Worst of all, she would have probably never known the truth if paramedics hadn't found the prosthetic penis that Heddington used, while they were taking him to the hospital the night in 2003 after he was stabbed in self-defense by his wife.

As time passed, the whole thing has become just a sad memory for Rudavsky, whose charges of second degree murder were dismissed once an investigation into the murder confirmed that she had indeed acted in self-defense. Almost nine years after the fact, it's still hard to understand how someone could withstand such abuse, to the point that she was beaten with a metal pipe for trivial things like not cooking fast enough, not sitting correctly (whatever that means), and not acting "like a lady," as the investigators later found out.

The bottom line is that everyone has a limit, and without a doubt, Rudavsky reached hers when she took matters into her own hands and murdered her husband one night when the abuse got to be too much, stabbing him in the stomach and freeing herself from the hell she had been living. I really hope this horrible experience taught her to NEVER allow someone to abuse her like this again. No one deserves to be treated the way this woman was for so long!

Image via ID TV

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About the author

Sandra Ortiz Juarez graduated with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications from the University of the Americas Puebla (UDLAP) in Mexico. Sandra received her Masters in Broadcast Journalism from the Escuela Superior de Imagen y Sonido (CES) in Madrid, Spain. She has collaborated with various media outlets including TV AZTECA (Mexico), Libertad Digital Television (Madrid, Spain), AOL Latino (New York) and she is now working with Mamás Latinas in their New York office.

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Add Comment What do you think of this strange case?

nonmember avatar
I saw the show which featured this story. I found it almost heart wrenching for this poor woman. First to put up with being horribly abused and second having to admit "he" was actually a "she". I don't think it ultimately matters about the sex of the abuser, what matters is domestic violence is still happening and often times in places and ways you don't expect. I do not believe this woman ever thought she would find herself in such a situation, it could happen to anyone.
nonmember avatar
i saw this on TV the other night and couldn't figure out WHY she married him either - the abuse and then to lie and say she was pregnant, i think part of her wanted to stay in the relationship b/c 'someone loved her'
ML...

I saw this on Investigation Discovery! I felt so bad for Elizabeth. :( You'd be surprised how much someone will put up with when they're severely abused like she was and when they love the person. It's really tragic. I'm glad she got out alive and is doing better now.

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Even women are better at abusing women than men are.
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He or She deserved to die. I hope this woman finds peace and someone nice to be with.
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How did she get "pregnant"?
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Strange is the right description. It is hard to believe the wife never knew, never suspected he was really a female.
nonmember avatar
I read a story about a woman who was married for about 20 years to man and found out after his death that he was a woman. He also like this story told her, that he had been in an accident where his penis had been damaged. He also didn't allow her to see him naked.
nonmember avatar
I find it incredibly hard to believe that, especially in a family gathering, not one family member turned to another and queried, "Say, doncha think there's something not quite right with this one...".
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wonky-bonkers!
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