They say that you can be close to someone and never truly know who they are. This was the case for a 64-year-old Belgian man who claims his Indonesian wife, 'Monica' of 19 years used to be a man. The shocking discovery came after a reunion with his wife's family, when her cousin laid the truth on him.

According to the U.K. Daily Mail, the man, who has been identified only as Jan, had been married twice before and says he met 'Monica' during a tumultuous time in his last marriage when they fell in love. He claims that he never would have thought that she had been a man during their marriage and courtship because she had all feminine qualities. Most recently, their relationship had been on the rocks and it's most obvious that her little secret didn't help their marital issues.

My initial reaction to this story was utter laughter, but then I thought: How crazy would it be to find out your significant other wasn't who you thought they were? What makes this man's story more outrageous is the fact that they were married for almost two decades! People complain that dating is difficult and this situation makes it seem like asking about any sex changes on the first date is a good idea.

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According to Jan, he met 'Monica' when she was 27 years old and although she had no interest in having children (hmm, I wonder why), he was fine with it since he already had two. But he did have a few clues that his wife was a little bit "different" than most women. One of which was the fact that she couldn't clean or iron well--HA!

However, as many love stories go, their relationship was on the rocks within the last couple of years. Jan says, 'Monica' started staying out late, wearing tiny revealing clothing, and checking out young men online. After learning of his wife's well kept secret, he confronted her and she admitted that she had been a boy at one point. The outraged husband claims he felt betrayed and although a judge didn't allow him to evict her, they still live under the same roof, but sleep in separate bedrooms.

I still find it impossible to believe that Jan didn't have a clue that his wife was a transgender after all those years of marriage. It must feel like the greatest form of deception to not be told a secret so big by your spouse. But at the same time I can't blame 'Monica' for keeping it to herself. Telling your hubby something like that would make things weird and complicated. Hopefully she finds someone who will love her for who she is despite her past, and maybe Jan will get lucky and meet someone who is all woman.

Image via Thinkstock

Add Comment Do you think Jan had any indication that his wife was a man?
About the author

Giselle Castro is the Editorial Assistant at Mamás Latinas. She loves anything involving film, fitness, nutrition, social media and catching up on the latest entertainment news.

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Add Comment Do you think Jan had any indication that his wife was a man?

nonmember avatar
Surgically adjusted men is a phrase steeped in hate. The AMA and APA disagree with this view. Gender identity is innate hardwired physiology. Hormonal and surgical changes are possible today, unlike changing core gender identity in the brain. This year, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders replaces “ gender identity disorder” with “gender dysphoria,” severe persistent depression, discomfort, and discontentment ridiculed by the previous commenter. One-third of transgender commit suicide. They are more often victims of violence and murder than any other group. Gender expression and gender identity are being rapidly added to equality and protection policy around the world. This prejudice will soon seem as backward as racism. “You can tell” is a myth. Women are of all shapes and sizes inclusive of features commonly seen as transgender specific. No single visible feature can be found on all transgender women. Many remain stealth due to employment discrimination and the invalidation, stigma, and prejudice still lingering in society. Transgender women ARE all woman. Simply put: They walk among you. Withholding something this big makes an unstable foundation for marriage but it is this culture of hostility and rejection that give cause to keep it hidden. He deserves disclosure but she deserves a husband who is not so bigoted that he readily rejects his wife of 20 years. In this sense, being forthcoming might have benefited them both.
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Honestly the marriage should be allowed an annulment (regardless of the timeframe) due to fraud. "Her" husband had a right to know beforehand that the person he was set to marry was a transgender.
slick...

In respone to X a transgender woman will never be all woman..because of  that particular word "transgender". The husband has every right to reject  the he/she (1) not born a woman (2) hid his gender and maybe just maybe the husband wanted to marry a real woman that God created not man.

x it will NOT be like 'racism'. In fact they are mentally challenged and need to be treated as such. GOD will not tolerate this at all. These people are pepulsive and need to stay where they are. They cant be and will not be EVER a part of society.  Many areas are suing and arresting them for FRAUD when they lied about their gender. BORN is BORN and Will DIE as BORN!

Hating Homosexuals is NOT a form of Bigotry anymore than it is to HATE someone who has sex with animals or children. Its repulsive and many do not and will not tolerate homobullying. Many actually are GOD fearing people and will do anything to rid these beings from Normal society. Being that they are not normal MUST stop harassing and Stealing the 'racism' ruse.

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To any transgendered person reading this, please know that there are people who fight for your right for life, liberty & the pursuit of happiness. We do not have to understand what you're going through in order to help create an environment where you don't fear for your safety simply because of who you are. You are a human being just like the rest of us and deserve the same humane treatment. We will press on. Do not drown in the sea of negativity- stay strong and don't let ANYONE crush your hopes or dreams.

How could he not know when she took her clothes off , and they had sex .

nonmember avatar
Additionally, JeepGirl - There is no such thing as "a transgender". You can say a person is "a transsexual" or you can say a person "is transgender". You cannot however, say a person is "a transgender". The person is either male or female, just as you are, and without parentheticals. End of discussion on this. Google is your friend - get informed!
nonmember avatar
Bruce Kalashnikov - Deceptive Garbage? Really? Why so angry? Why the name calling and judgment? It would appear you've taken this story to a personal level with yourself else why be so obnoxiously opinionated? Bruce Kalashnikov - God will not tolerate...what? Clearly he is more than "tolerant" else why would the DSM1 IV estimate 1 in 30 thousand males are transgendered and 1 in 100 thousand females have identified themselves as having very strong trans feelings???? I believe those numbers alone indicate God is OK with it! Sounds like YOU are the intolerant one. Oh, and don't EVER say EVER. Ha! Also Bruce Kalashnikov - how is homosexuality relevant to this story? Transsexuals are not necessarily homosexual. I can't believe I read such an ignorant statement. Get informed! Lastly (because you annoy me) Bruce Kalashnikov - what/who constitutes "normal"? You? Your perception? Your peer group? Your spiritual/religious affiliation? Your political party? Who?
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Maybe she should've explained to him before hand.
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