If a Latina wrote "50 Shades of Grey" it would be a lot different

I did it. I succumbed to the peer pressure and read 50 Shades of Grey--all three of them, in one shot. While I certainly learned A LOT, I have to say, it did not live up to the hype. First, as you may have heard, the writing is less than great. Second--maybe because I am Latina, maybe not--but the whole "Grey" thing doesn't appeal to me (it is a little depressing).

I can, however, totally see why women are obsessed with the character of Christian Grey. He is hot, he is rich, he's an expert lover and he can DANCE! Bring it on.

With the following suggested changes, this would be the perfect book for Latinas:

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Lose the grey: I don't mean Christian, I mean the color. One of the main "turn ons" in the book is his infamous grey tie that he uses to tied heroine Anastasia Steele up. Also, silver and white cars, White and black clothes, etc. Grey, grey, grey. I get it, it is his name, it's a writer's motif but every time I was supposed to be turned on by the appearance of his grey tie, I just went cold. The visual of a pale girl wrapped in a grey tie isn't hot. Red? Too obvious. Dark blue? Hell yeah!

Stop fighting the power: Our heroine Ana is very concerned with Christian's wealth and power, because she is afraid of seemingly being paid for sex. I get that but shut up already. If a man I loved wanted to buy me a company and let me run it, I would graciously accept and run that thing until it becomes the best company I could. And a Latina would never complain about the high-end lingerie collection he buys for her, just saying.

The hair pulling and lip biting have to go: It just ruins our hair and make up--that's a no no. Spank us all you want but don't mess with the hair.

Did you like 50 Shades of Grey? What would you have changed? Tell us in the comments below.

Image via Amazon

Topics: 50 shades of grey